This past trip to Brazil I heard a joke from a seasoned Brazilian coffee buyer.
Negotiating at the same event, we both knew that I was offering well above a fair price for some good coffees (more than 60% above market price, for a frame of reference), and far more than anyone else would be offering for those coffees. Yet several of the producers wanted to push for even more. The Brazilian coffee buyer, who also had tried to buy some of the same lots in vain, even stepped in to tell them that they should take my offer, since it was very likely more than they would see again. When they told me they wanted to wait and see, he told me the following joke:
A coffee farmer is out walking in his field one day and comes across a magic lamp. He picks up the lamp, rubs it, and, sure enough, out pops a genie. “Congratulations,” says the genie. “I will grant you three wishes. Just say it and I will make it come true.”
The farmer scratches his head and thinks for a minute. “Alright,” he says, “for my first wish, I want to sleep with the most beautiful woman in the world. For my second I would like to own a Ferrari. For my third wish, I would like to sell coffee at $1,000 a pound.”
“No problem, my dear farmer,” says the genie. “Return to your house and there you will find the most beautiful woman in the world in your bed, a Ferrari in your garage, and coffee at $1,000 a pound.”
Three months later the genie is awoken by the farmer frantically rubbing the magic lamp. “What is the matter?” the surprised genie says. “You only get three wishes, my dear farmer, and yours have already been granted. Did you not return to your bed to find the most beautiful woman in the world?”
“I did,” replies the farmer.
“And did you not go to your garage and see a brand new Ferrari?” asks the genie.
“I did,” again replies the farmer.
“And did you not sell your coffee at $1,000 a pound?” asks the genie.
“Well… you see,” says the farmer, fidgeting from side to side, “I.. uh. I didn’t really want to sell because I thought the price would go up even more.”
Coffee buyer joke.